Installment #3
Today’s piece is written by Howard Gordon, Executive Producer of 24.
I remember being in a writers’ room a few years ago, and someone - a brilliant and famous writer whose name I’ll keep to myself for now - rhapsodized about the exquisite ecstasy of the writing process. “Don’t you love it when you get lost inside the story, and the characters start speaking for themselves, and you look up and realize eight hours have passed?” I nodded dumbly, and smiled. Because I had no idea what the fuck he was talking about.
I’ve never had that experience. Never. Me, I’m a grinder. And a second-guesser. Since I can remember, I have suffered from some undiagnosed combination of OCD and ADD which causes me to spend hours on a preposition. Which is a long-winded way to describe this simple truth: I hate writing. I really do. Even writing this short essay is excruciating. Every word weighs on me like a millstone. Every. Single. Word.
What makes the process even more excruciating is that I am my own worst critic. No one has more contempt for my work than me. So studio and network notes are usually a cakewalk. Whatever they dish out, chances are I’ve already dished out for myself and come back for seconds.
So why do I write? Because as much as I hate writing, I love having written. All the pain suddenly falls away when the dialogue turns from a bunch of words under a character name into the living voices of real people, and the plot becomes more than just a series of events, but a story worth telling. However we get there, if we’re lucky, eventually we get there. Word by word. Line by line.
I write because it’s the only thing I’ve ever wanted to do. Not a day goes by that I don’t appreciate what a privilege it is to be a member of this profession. I suppose in some way, being a writer is the buy-in that allows me to enjoy the company and respect of my fellow writers. To count so many professional writers as friends and colleagues is one of my proudest accomplishments. I may not enjoy the creative process as much as my unnamed colleague, but I’d wager my WGA pension that I get every bit as much pleasure from my final draft – which only makes me want to belly up to the laptop and do it all over again.
Installment #3 of WHY WE WRITE is a series of short essays by prominent television and film writers and conceived by Charlie Craig and Thania St. John. (Contact them at whywewrite@gmail.com). I have asked the AMPTP to give me original content expressing its side of the current strike, but the group has declined to date.
“I love having written.”
As one who writes but doesn’t have the talent (well, certainly not the drive) to make it a profession, that line says it ALL to me. My scribblings will live past me, hopefully.
Stand up to those cocksuckers, dammit! You CANNOT lose, unless you lose. My best to you all, you are some of my heroes.
Joe
Comment by joe — December 26, 2007 @ 3:12 pm
NOTES FROM SANTA’S MAIL BAG
Saint Nick the Counter here boys and girls. I always enjoy the day after Christmas because I get to relax and catch up on all the letters I filed under the Naughty List. Here’s one from little Nikki Finke in California. She didn’t get any Christmas present at all this year not even a lump of coal because she was a very naughty girl. Nikki writes:
“I have asked the AMPTP to give me original content expressing its side of the current strike, but the group has declined to date.”
Dear Nikki Finke,
WHY I DON’T WRITE #4
By Nicholas Counter, AMPTP President
Why in the world would I ever want to write? Those damn writers make much less money than I do. I make a million dollars a year and all I have to do is reject every single reasonale demand any union ever makes. It’s the easiest job in the world. So for me writing would be a waste of time. I’d lose money if I wrote. Even reading is a chore for me which is why I never read scripts. I don’t even read coverage. I just look at numbers all day long. The bottom line is the only thing I care about. I get paid to save the studios money. They lavish me with perks and gifts and extra money under the table. So to answer your question Little Nikki, this is why I don’t write. Your pal,
Jolly Saint Nick Counter
AMPTP President
Comment by Saint Nick the Counter — December 26, 2007 @ 3:32 pm
What do “The X-Files ” and “24″–the two most interesting and exciting dramas of the past fifteen years–have in common?
The answer: Howard Gordon worked on both series from the beginning. He may not enjoy writing, but we ALL enjoy his having written.
Comment by unitedwesit — December 26, 2007 @ 3:59 pm
I liked the essay. Keep them coming.
Nikki’s site right now, with the Santa caption-thing, the essays and all — it’s as if the AMPTP’s big swing on X-Mas Eve was just a blip on the screen. It’s as if their idiotic table-banging was just the wind blowing by… Nice work.
The studio heads’ statement reminded me of when I was a kid playing ball in the street and the old guy-neighbor would scream out that he’s going to call the cops if we don’t move away from his house. We still played, the cops were never called.
Comment by Nikki fan — December 26, 2007 @ 5:00 pm
These WHY WE WRITE pieces are so inspiring — I’m cutting and pasting each one of them into a word document so the next time I’m angsting over words and characters, I’ll have somewhere to turn for encouragement.
Comment by zagyzebra — December 26, 2007 @ 6:55 pm
These are really heartfelt. They also give invaluable insight into the writing process. Thank you.
Comment by mla28 — December 26, 2007 @ 8:21 pm
Who cares? Nikki, this pandering to writers has hit it’s nadir with all this. There are other issues in Hollywood you could be covering.
Comment by alex — December 26, 2007 @ 8:39 pm
Mr. Gordon,
Beautifully put.
Thank you.
Comment by Al — December 26, 2007 @ 8:40 pm
I am with you. I am a manager for the sole reason that I love and revere writers and writing. I can’t do it. I have tried. The blank computer screen, and the mistakes, are too draining of my soul. So, I represent writers. To fight for their rights and the respect they deserve. Thanks for sharing. I know that when others read writers’ work, it’s like open heart surgery. Scary, often demeaning and misunderstood. And, as a producer, I have seen story notes from studios that make my toes curl. I can only imagine what happens to a writer who receives them. At the beginning of my career, I didn’t argue with studio execs. I was grateful for the sales, for my clients and for me. Now, I get sooo angry and say it. Words are gems. Especially the way you all organize, agonize and imagine them. Best wishes to all of us that this ends soon and the creativity that has made this business what it was, and can still be, will prevail.
SofiaM
Comment by Sofiam — December 26, 2007 @ 8:52 pm
As an aspiring writer, these essays are becoming the reason I wake up. It’s good to know working writers have just as much hate and frustration as I do.
Comment by Kid Danger — December 27, 2007 @ 6:29 am